Want to have a gut busting good time in Munich?  Forgo the ritzy tours that have a tendency to isolate you from the natives.  Instead, go for the FREE WomTours Munich tour originating at Wombat’s City Hostel, Senefelderstrasse 1, near the central train station, the Hauptbanhof, at 11AM most days. It’s one of the best-kept secrets in town.  Most non-hostel guests hear of it only by word-of mouth. 

 Be sure to pick the best tour guide in town, Ozzie, who can be reached at tour@osbournkemp.com, if you’d like to confirm his schedule.  Ozzie is a transplanted Bahamian/Canadian with German relatives who gives uniquely informative David Lettermen-like tongue-in-cheek hilarious tours of the old city in Munich.

Ozzie is an anomaly for Munich.  You can’t miss him. He’s not exactly a typical example of Hitler’s Aryan race.  Ozzie’s a good looking tall well-tanned immigrant Bavarian in impeccable lederhosen who has made a place for himself in the tour guide circuit in Bavaria’s favorite town by giving informative and funny walkabouts.  

He implies that the Nazi’s have gone into retirement, as evidenced by the fact that he speaks openly and irreverently of the Third Reich on a daily basis and still has all his body parts in tact.  (You might add “so far”, just so he doesn’t become overly confident)

Ozzie’s glib English dissertation begins near the Hauptbanhof at Wombat’s City Hostel.  There you’ll meet up with a somewhat motley group of teenage-plus students and young-of-heart types and take a guided tour that will take you to the Frauenkirche, Marienplatz, the Glockenspiel, the Viktualienmarkt, Hofbrauhaus, Karlsplatz, Maximillinstasse, St Michaels, the National Theater, Odeonplatz, The Residence and Surfers Wave, ending  in the most fabulous park in the world, the English Garden, with a beautiful smooth beer  and delectable food while you hob knob with Ozzie.  

You’ll be quizzed as your tour progresses to make sure you’re staying with the program.  Ozzie likes to suggest that if you haven’t been paying attention and you don’t know the answer, just respond with the word “beer’’. Chances are that you’ll be correct. Munich life has always revolved around beer, which is considered more of a liquid food than a vice. Beer is accordingly the answer to many points of historical reference.

Many on the tour seem to be hung over from the previous days liquid nourishment and seem grateful for the simplified testing process.  Blurting out the word “beer” conserves a lot of their scarce cerebral energy.

You’ll also become privy to all sorts of interesting Munich trivia. You’ll learn odd facts of historical figures, as well as current tourists. For example, around Oktoberfest time, did you know that Australians seem to disproportionately populate Munich?  And, never noted for missing a party, the Aussies apparently have a tendency to become disoriented and lose their passports.  Accordingly, Australia, which doesn’t normally have an embassy in Munich, sets up a temporary one to accommodate their lost brethren.  Got to love those Australians.   

Ozzie’s like a frustrated history teacher with a quirky sense of humor. You get the feeling he really wants you to learn something, while entertaining you at the same time. You’ll be educated unwittingly by his professorial ability to infuse history and comedy into a tour. You may be in Munich for fun, but by the time your tour has ended, you’ll not only have had a great time, but you’ll also have been comically force-fed all sorts of facts and figures regarding the history of this magical city.

You’ll laugh till you drop and learn a lot about the history of Munich.  Don’t miss it.  It’s fun and it’s free, but if you have a conscious in tact you’ll probably want to tip your tour guide handsomely for the experience.  He only works for tips, a true capitalist, and seems to do quite well. 

Ozzie is a real treasure in Munich’s landscape.  His tour will be a memorable part of your Munich experience, one you’ll long remember after the memories of those dry and boring tours, you are probably used to, have long faded away. 

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